Cariad Eccleston

Just a gin-filled dork.

I stepped WAY out of my comfort zone today

10 January 2019

I stepped WAY out of my comfort zone today.

I recorded a vlog.

Bloody hell

It all kicked off this morning. I took my camera out to the seafront, and I chatted about myself and my plans while I took my regular-ish sunrise walk.

Then I went up to Exeter, worked in the library for a bit, and added clips through the day.

Now I’m home, and I just looked at a bunch of the clips, and I’m like…

What the hell was I thinking?

I saw technically great video – damn, I love this camera and lens – but front and centre, I saw a body that hasn’t transitioned well.

I don’t have a face for video. I don’t have a voice for video.

And I want to put that face and that voice online?

Goddamnit.

Yeah, but WHAT WAS I thinking?

I was thinking… that I wanted to align myself with the best of the folks I see on YouTube. I wanted to be a little bit closer to my heroes.

And, honestly, filming these things is fun!

Plus… honestly, I guess I’m a little bit scared that the written word is fading away.

Of all the folks I want to keep up with – whether because they entertain me, educate me, or whatever – probably 90% of them share their lives on YouTube. 9% of the rest share their lives via podcasts. Only a couple keep a written blog.

I love writing – whether it’s short-form, long-form, blog, fiction, non-fiction, whatever – the process of drafting and publishing does something to me. But I don’t want that love to cloud my judgement. Blogging ain’t what it used to be, and I was a bit afraid of being left behind.

It’s not the end of the world

It’s not like I had any plans to make a career out of vlogging. This doesn’t really change my life.

It just makes me feel a bit sad that even I can’t stand the sight of myself.